Female pornography addicts...

You're not alone!

There seems to be a certain stigma that women who are addicted to pornography assume. Shame is common among pornography addicts, but especially among those who are female. After all, they are supposed to be prim and proper with no propensity for illicit behavior. Pornographers have always depicted women as the object of desire. Women are supposed to be the sought after, not the seeker. Or so society silently says.

Sadly, a lot of the pornography that is targeted toward women is produced by women - women who choose to victimize other women. Those producers understand the differences between the male and female brain and produce films with the female market in mind.

Women normally look at sex through the filter of romance and relationship - both forms of communication. They enjoy hugging and kissing, as well as other forms of physical closeness while men are seduced by the visual imagery of the sex act itself (whatever form it takes). Pornographers know that and have begun to produce porn films that include thinly veiled portrayals of relationships.

On page 176 of his excellent book, The Drug of The New Millennium - The Science of How Internet Pornography Radically Alters the Human Brain and Body, (ISBN 1-930980-63-9) author and researcher Mark B. Kastleman says, "Internet pornographers often use 'average looking' females as their subjects so that the female viewer can more easily relate by fantasizing or imagining herself playing the role. Likewise, they portray both the male and female pleasuring each other equally...In essence, the Internet pornographers have taken the successful 'soap opera/romance novel' genre and wrapped it around pornography in order to seduce the female viewer."

Chat rooms...

The first step toward the bottom

Many women are locked in their own battle against an addiction to pornography today because somewhere along the way they went out on a search - a search for relationship, for communion with someone who cared, a sense of being loved for who they were, not for what Playboy said they should have been. For many, the search began when a husband refused to be the man of the family that he should have been, choosing instead to go out and live his life alone. For some the search began earlier, during the pubescent years when the young lady longed for a clear picture of who she was and what she was to become.

Enter chat rooms. Internet chat rooms paved the way for a woman to sit alone in the coldness of a house deserted by the man (though he may still "live" there) she once loved and live an active fantasy life. She could be whoever she wanted to be. She could be as pretty as she wished. She could be as meek or as domineering as she desired, regardless of the reality of her personality. Suddenly she found herself in a place where she was accepted. She was "loved," though not really. She was appreciated, but only for the side of her that was exposed to the chatter on the other end.

From chat rooms, where mental visualization is the master, it is only a short step into the world of graphic porn - the world of videos, magazines, and cable shows. Chat rooms no longer satisfy. The addiction takes over and forces an urge toward more graphic and sensual material. She may find herself sneaking through the back door of the downtown porn shop, or watching so-called adult videos in the middle of the night while the family sleeps in the next room.

Then one day, the lady wakes up and realizes that she is addicted. She may or may not realize at this point that for the past several months or years she has neglected her children and her husband. She may suddenly realize why her relationships all seem to be falling apart.

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Pornography addiction doesn't discriminate!

Pornography addiction invades the lives of people both sexes, in all age groups, ethnic backgrounds, religious faiths, and social status. Even young people are affected by it. But regardless what background the addict has, there is help! God is able to change the most addicted mind - even the mind of a person whose involvement in pornography has progressed to the stage of his acting out with criminal consequences what he sees in his viewing material. He is able to renew the mind and heart of any person who will ask Him. Learn how to take that first step by reading "Prayer - the beginning of change".

If you are addicted to pornography and would like further information regarding this problem and how you can be set free from it, feel free to contact us. We will respond with whatever information we can. Our Referrals Page offers additional resources that you should consider taking advantage of.

The progression of pornography addiction

Did you know that pornography addiction has stages, just as drug addiction does? It's true that it does. I have personally been through all of the stages...and back.

Perhaps you are struggling with the addiction, but have no idea how far you've come or how far you might go. The "Read more" link that follows this section will take you to a page that will tell you in no uncertain terms what the stages of pornography addiction are. You will probably see yourself in at least one of them. The stages are possible for both men and women.

Note to Parents

Please use discretion when allowing children to view this page. There is no obscene or pornographic information on it, or any other page of this site, but pornography addiction is ugly and specific information about the course it can take should be viewed with an adult who can determine whether the page is age appropriate for the child and who can then answer the child's questions. Remember that the largest group of pornography users is boys between the ages of 12 and 17. The average first use for boys is age 11 and for girls, it is age 13. You, the parent, should assist your children in learning the painfully destructive consequences of pornography use, just as you would with drug or alcohol use.

[Read The Progression of Pornography Addiction]

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